Monday, December 29, 2014


"Anna...I need a back rub."
"Anna...can you scratch my back, just little bit?"
"Anna, can you make me a vanilla latte...pweeeeeeze?"
"Anna, could you please fix my hair?"
"Hey, Anna! You should come sledding with us!"

Typical "big sister" questions. Unfortunately, they usually generate "big sister" answers.

"Is it sore? You don't need one if your back doesn't hurt. I don't ask for backrubs unless mine hurts. Not right now."

"Vanilla Latte? Well, I'm kinda busy this morning, and - oh, look! The coffee pot is empty. I don't think that will work out."

 "Becca....  <sigh>, but just a second."

"Sledding?! It's too cold. I'm too tired. I just came home from work, and...don't you guys just want to sit on the couch for, uuuuuh, a few minutes?

Sad, but true. And no matter how nicely you try to word things, the cold, bold, old message is still there.


But if we big sisters {or even, the little sisters} would think back to the last time we said "no," would we find that we were truly: completely too exhausted, excruciatingly busy, or totally out of time? Most likely, not. There's a big difference between 'tired' and 'too tired'. Most of the time, we're just 'tired." There are a few occasions when we're actually up to our ears with things-to-be-done in the day - but not so many that we can't have time to read a story, make a quick cup of hot chocolate or give a little hug. Seems to me, that the last three things would have more eternal value than "GUESS WHAT! I FINISHED MY CHORE LIST AT 6:45 THIS MORNING!" (Which never happens, btw.)

Next time you want to say "NO!" think a minute. Would it really kill you to go sledding for 45 minutes? Not really.

I tried it last night. It was fun - the howling, screeching, flying, kind of fun. In spite of being ground up, squashed, smacked in the throat by somebody's headlamp (yes, it was still on somebody's head) and nearly pulverized underneath a pile of, like, nearly all of us... it was incredible and memorable and completely worth it.

To what have you been saying no?


Shannon said...

Thank you for this ever needed reminder. Its so easy to put excuses out there so that our selfishness can take control, and at the end of the day, I always have to ask myself whether or not I lived for others or myself. {And each year, the "tired" excuse keeps getting stronger for some reason. haha :) } Thank you for the inspiration to put others first and to give of myself for things which truly matter.


Bethany Carson said...

Very good and thought-provoking post!